SOS: We $old Our $ouls For Cock & Bull.
Saturday's satisfying, satori saturated satire.
Broke? Strapped for cash? Tired of creditors lining up to take a number at your front door?
Well then Conspiravangelist™ Productions® has an exciting opportunity for you to turn your fiscal woes into financial WOWS!!
For a limited time, you can break into a blossoming market with our unique ground floor business package! This is NOT MLM, you are purchasing a license* to use our proven techniques to enrich your quality of life.
It's time to take control of your destiny and start a new career as a Conspiravangelist™
Some of the advantages of our system are;
We will provide you with a step by step guide that ensures success with just a little of your creativity and minimal investment of your time. You could be earning money from your own business in the first week.
Sound too good to be true? Well it isn't and the ever increasing number of people that are getting rich with our one-of-a kind business model has helped to propel a previously obscure cottage industry into one of the fastest growing market sectors of the 21st century.
Don't let this opportunity pass you by. Begin today and start making money as if by magic.
You will be provided with all the tools necessary to become a successful Conspiravangelist™.
It's as easy as picking a contentious subject, producing a video that endorses the contentious subject material and posting a low quality version for people to 'preview' on various 'social' websites with links to purchase the high quality DVD and Ka-CHING, presto chango, near instant fame & fortune.
You can then supplement the income provided by your video with t-shirts, bumper stickers, jewellery, home furnishings, dental floss, lunchboxes, etc.
The merchandising prospects are nearly infinite, not to mention the radio & television appearances, all the while travelling the world sharing your information with the adoring masses.
For example a video called, "THE HAREBLE TRUTH" which outlines how telepathic, multi-dimensional, quantum presbyterian leporidae that are residing in a crater on the dark side of moon are controlling the world's elite will undoubtedly generate massive 'buzz' upon release which can then be parlayed into cold hard cash.
All it takes are some old NASA clips, a couple of dozen blurry photos, a few moody tracks to enhance the experience, add a simple narrative with references to that stalker astronaut and a few generally unknown but very rich people and badabing, badaboom, it's off to the bank to deposit the loot.
And don't worry about doubters & detractors as one of the benefits of this technique is that those that hate your video will actually do much of the work to promote your product. For example when someone inevitably releases "SCREW THE HAREBLE TRUTH" or some such title, this only helps to promote that work as people will become curious as to what is causing all the fuss.
It also opens the door for a possible lawsuit if the makers of "SCREW THE HAREBLE TRUTH" make libelous statements in their video, which translates into an additional revenue stream. That Bentley is getting closer every day.
FUD is your friend, in these trying days Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt are strong motivating factors that can be applied as marketing strategies.
Industry studies show that there is an increasing demand for qualified Conspiravangelists™ in every major market.
Go to your phone, have your credit card ready and place your order right now. 1-800-CON-RUBES or visit us on the web at www.conspiravangelist-productions.com
As an added bonus the first 50 callers will receive a free Bullhorm, the official prop of Conspiravangelist™ Productions®. It's yours to keep, even if you decide to cancel your license.
If you hesitate, it may be too late. Don't be someone that says could've, would've, should've when you see others around making stacks of money from the comfort of their own homes. If not completely satisfied, we'll return your money***
*Terms of the license are subject to change without notice.
**This applies to our "Platinum Extreme Deluxe Enhanced Enterprise+" license agreement only, all other licenses are subject to recurring charges, fees and dues.
***Once you have paid for your license, that money is no longer yours and therefore is exempt from being returned under any circumstances.
Broke? Strapped for cash? Tired of creditors lining up to take a number at your front door?
Well then Conspiravangelist™ Productions® has an exciting opportunity for you to turn your fiscal woes into financial WOWS!!
For a limited time, you can break into a blossoming market with our unique ground floor business package! This is NOT MLM, you are purchasing a license* to use our proven techniques to enrich your quality of life.
It's time to take control of your destiny and start a new career as a Conspiravangelist™
Some of the advantages of our system are;
- work from home
- choose your own hours
- more time for family & friends
- our methods have been peer-reviewed
- NO residual fees thanks to our generous Pay Once & Earn Forever®** licensing format.
Join the Few, the Proud, the Inspired.
We will provide you with a step by step guide that ensures success with just a little of your creativity and minimal investment of your time. You could be earning money from your own business in the first week.
Sound too good to be true? Well it isn't and the ever increasing number of people that are getting rich with our one-of-a kind business model has helped to propel a previously obscure cottage industry into one of the fastest growing market sectors of the 21st century.
Don't let this opportunity pass you by. Begin today and start making money as if by magic.
You will be provided with all the tools necessary to become a successful Conspiravangelist™.
It's as easy as picking a contentious subject, producing a video that endorses the contentious subject material and posting a low quality version for people to 'preview' on various 'social' websites with links to purchase the high quality DVD and Ka-CHING, presto chango, near instant fame & fortune.
You can then supplement the income provided by your video with t-shirts, bumper stickers, jewellery, home furnishings, dental floss, lunchboxes, etc.
The merchandising prospects are nearly infinite, not to mention the radio & television appearances, all the while travelling the world sharing your information with the adoring masses.
For example a video called, "THE HAREBLE TRUTH" which outlines how telepathic, multi-dimensional, quantum presbyterian leporidae that are residing in a crater on the dark side of moon are controlling the world's elite will undoubtedly generate massive 'buzz' upon release which can then be parlayed into cold hard cash.
All it takes are some old NASA clips, a couple of dozen blurry photos, a few moody tracks to enhance the experience, add a simple narrative with references to that stalker astronaut and a few generally unknown but very rich people and badabing, badaboom, it's off to the bank to deposit the loot.
And don't worry about doubters & detractors as one of the benefits of this technique is that those that hate your video will actually do much of the work to promote your product. For example when someone inevitably releases "SCREW THE HAREBLE TRUTH" or some such title, this only helps to promote that work as people will become curious as to what is causing all the fuss.
It also opens the door for a possible lawsuit if the makers of "SCREW THE HAREBLE TRUTH" make libelous statements in their video, which translates into an additional revenue stream. That Bentley is getting closer every day.
FUD is your friend, in these trying days Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt are strong motivating factors that can be applied as marketing strategies.
Industry studies show that there is an increasing demand for qualified Conspiravangelists™ in every major market.
Go to your phone, have your credit card ready and place your order right now. 1-800-CON-RUBES or visit us on the web at www.conspiravangelist-productions.com
As an added bonus the first 50 callers will receive a free Bullhorm, the official prop of Conspiravangelist™ Productions®. It's yours to keep, even if you decide to cancel your license.
If you hesitate, it may be too late. Don't be someone that says could've, would've, should've when you see others around making stacks of money from the comfort of their own homes. If not completely satisfied, we'll return your money***
*Terms of the license are subject to change without notice.
**This applies to our "Platinum Extreme Deluxe Enhanced Enterprise+" license agreement only, all other licenses are subject to recurring charges, fees and dues.
***Once you have paid for your license, that money is no longer yours and therefore is exempt from being returned under any circumstances.
Welcome to the church of Pur$enility.
posted by PerpetualYnquisitive at 6/02/2007 04:44:00 AM
1 comments
